The Fall of TV - Part 2

Tuesday night – Finally a night of hard decisions.

ABC
According to Jim: This is not one of them.

Rodney: Another family/cute kid sitcom. I think I’ll pass.

Commander in Chief: So, Geena Davis is the president. But the world’s not ready! For a woman. This just seems so serious. And sad, since I’d rather see a woman actually be in the White House than see one playing at it.

Boston Legal: Okay, so, this is my guilty pleasure show. It’s complete camp. It’s James Spader and William Shatner in the same room feeding off each other. Throw in Candace Bergen and some Betty White here and there, and it’s beyond hilarious. And the fact that they’re getting rid of Monica Potter this year? I’m so stoked.

CBS
NCIS: What is this? CSI, but with the army?

The Amazing Race: I’ve heard this is the best reality show out there. But it’s got too much 9 o’clock competition for me to play along.

Close to Home: A legal drama. Without James Spader or William Shatner.

NBC
The Biggest Loser: This show is one of the reasons people go ex-patriot.

My Name is Earl: Okay. I love Jason Lee. And I would love to watch this show. It looks funny and a little unconventional and most importantly: Jason Lee. But it comes on at the same time as House

The Office: Ditto. I love Steve Carrell and I’ve heard really great things. But, House.

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Um, I don’t want to alarm anyone, but this Law & Order thing is reproducing like a lot of bored bunnies. Like, watching Law & Order bored.

Fox
Bones: This is David Boreanaz’s new show. I am glad he’s working. I want to make that clear. Even before the show aired, I was concerned about the leading lady of this show. In one of my less charitable moments, I called her “ugly in the face” much to Sam’s amusement. Still, I held out hope that, upon actually watching the show, I would come to like her, love her, laud her as a shining example of the betterment of not-that-attractive people on TV. As it turns out, per the pilot, her character is not only not attractive enough to play opposite David Boreanaz, she’s also pretty bitchy and meddlesome. While I can get on board with a bitchy woman, this woman seems like overkill with her nonsensical involvement in FBI cases and complete lack of pop culture references. I just think I have to let David Boreanaz and his meal ticket soldier on without me.

House: This, I will be watching. It’s bitchy done right. House is mean, but with a lot of humor and pop culture references that seem even funnier when Hugh Laurie pauses and relishes the words with wide eyes and a little ironic jut of chin. My hope for this season is that both Sela Ward and the lady who plays Dr. Cameron get very little screen time.

The WB
Gilmore Girls: Oh, Gilmore Girls, I can’t give you up. Sure, things have been a little disappointing the last few years, what with Rory going from zero to annoying in about the time it took her to snub Marty the Naked Guy for Logan the Dumb-Ass Party Boy and Walking Trust Fund. But I still care about what happens to Lorelai and Lane (when you show her), and Emily Gilmore is still that confounding combination of rich bitch jokes and heart-wrenching moments that makes her fascinating to watch.

Supernatural: You know, Jared Padalecki, I was on your side. Up to the moment that you returned to Gilmore Girls only to cheat on your wife and take the virgin out of Rory. Now, the floppy hair is a problem. Your features, which were so attractive at the beginning of Gilmore Girls, seem bland. Oh, and your new show looks like it’s all hype and very little substance. But I won’t be finding out if that’s true because I’ll be watching House.

UPN
America’s Next Top Model (rerun): UPN is giving Tyra Banks two primetime opportunities to try to ensnare you in her tangle of fake hair and model wannabes.

Sex, Love & Secrets: Okay, so, I don’t really care what this is about. But the name bugs me. I mean, I keep wanting to say Sex, Lies and Videotape and instead it’s this pale imitation which really boils down to a collection of clichés. The thing about Sex, Lies and Videotape is that the name clues you in to the full-on shallow titillation to come. Which, I’m sure is what this show is all about, but look at the pretension of adding Love to that.

The verdict: Gilmore Girls, House and Boston Legal. Probably the only night of the week when I have shows lined up through 11 and even have some regrets about what I can’t watch.

Again, more later.